Layoffs Impact Christmas
Source: Connect with Kids
“It’s very, very tight at the end of the month.”
– Tom Hannaford, unemployed father
The telephone rings in Tom Hannaford’s in-home office. “Visual Solutions. Tom Hannaford,” he answers.
Hannaford is an independent contractor, but he is currently out of work.
“It’s really, really slow,” Hannaford says. “That little extra cushion that I bring in is not there, so it’s very, very tight at the end of the month.”
Hannaford has tried to shield his children from his troubles, but they still understand on a very basic level what’s happening.
“He’s looking for another job because nobody has any work for him to do,” his 9-year old daughter Mary says.
It has been a tough year for the American workforce. More than 10 million people are out of work, hundreds of thousands of them laid off since the recession began last September.
For many people, the loss of a job translates into a less plentiful holiday season.
“We’re gonna make the sacrifices that we have to make to get them some special things,” Hannaford says. “Would we get them as many things as we might otherwise? Maybe not.”
Layoffs can be stressful and scary for adults and children. Experts suggest that parents explain their job situation to their children. Open and honest communication can be reassuring. As far as the holiday season is concerned: Focus on the family, not the gifts.
“Make it exciting for them to have this time together,” advises psychiatrist Dr. John Lochridge. “Downplay the gifts … and the activities become substitutes for gifts that are actually more valuable.”
However tight times are, experts tell parents to stay positive because their children are watching and learning.
“The kids need to see that you’re not giving up. You’re gonna keep trying,” Dr. Lochridge says.
Hannaford remains hopeful. “I’ve got enough faith to know that something’s out there. Something will come my way, and the economy hopefully is gonna turn around.”
Tips for Parents
Will the recession cause Americans to spend less on their children’s presents this Christmas? According to a recent survey by the American Research Group, the answer is yes. The average projected spending for this year is $431, down just 50 percent from last year.
Unemployment is difficult for the entire family, especially during the Christmas season. A laid-off textile worker in Georgia told the American Federation of Labor and Congress of Industrial Organizations (AFL-CIO), “The thing I hated most was telling my kids that things are going to be a little tight for awhile.” If you find yourself without a job this Christmas, the AFL-CIO offers some advice to keep in mind:
Your spouse and children may feel as helpless as you do.
Talk about your problems and plans with your family.
Children generally sense tension in the home. Explain your unemployment situation to them, and include them in developing your plans to deal with it.
Plan and work together as a family to reduce household costs.
Children can help by delaying requests for expensive extras.
By working a part-time job on weekends, teens can help reduce their parents’ financial pressure. This enables each member of the family to take positive steps to help.
Receiving fewer presents at Christmas may leave some children feeling deprived and depressed. However, parents can remind their children that Christmas is not just a season of receiving; it’s also a time of giving. Children may feel better about their own situation if they focus on ways to help others who are less fortunate. Consider these ideas to help children learn about the importance of giving:
Encourage your children to choose one item from their Christmas or birthday wish lists and donate it to a less-fortunate child.
Help your children donate a portion of their allowances and birthday money to the charity of their choice.
Instead of exchanging duplicate gifts, have children donate one of the items to charity.
Organize a food drive in your neighborhood. Even small children can help deliver and collect bags.
Organize a toy, book or clothing drive.
Help your children write letters or draw pictures to mail to the elderly or others in town who are not able to get out much.
Volunteer to read to the blind.
Walk, brush, feed and clean pets at a rescue shelter.
As a family, spend some time volunteering at a food kitchen. Let children help fix plates and clear the tables.
Work together to make baked goods as a donation to a church, community or charity fair.
Volunteer with Habitat for Humanity. Volunteers are needed to build, paint, cook and serve food.
Visit a local nursing home and “Adopt a Grandparent.” Newborns and toddlers can come along to provide company and lots of hugs. Older children can read to residents and put on plays or skits.
References
AFL-CIO
American Research Group, Inc.
The Gallup organization
Tuesday, December 23, 2008
Thursday, December 11, 2008
Sue Scheff - Profanity on TV
Source: Connect with Kids
“If you’re a teenage boy and you’re hanging with a bunch of your peers and you get the reputation as the guy whose offended by a cuss word, you will be teased unmercifully.”
– Robert Kleemeier, Ph.D., Psychologist
A fight at the batting cage and one kid expresses his anger with profanity: “shut the f..k up … you fat...”
If you think words like that are shocking to kids- think again. Cussing is common in their conversations.
“I say s..t, I say damn, but when I get mad I say f..k,” says 14-year-old MaryLou.
15-year-old Bobby says, “F..k, damn, b..ch.”
And 11-year-old Sara says “S..t,” but only “when something happens.”
In fact, some experts say in some kids social circles swearing is not just accepted, but expected. “If you’re a teenage boy and you’re hanging with a bunch of your peers and you get the reputation as the guy who’s offended by a cuss word, you will be teased unmercifully,” explains psychologist Dr. Robert Kleemeier.
Bobby agrees, “I think it’s just a manlier way to express yourself.”
Experts estimate that some kids use profanity upwards of 80 times a day. They say it’s, in part, due to television.
In fact, according to the Parents Television Council, the use of swear words on T-V has nearly doubled in the past ten years.
But, experts say, pop culture aside, it’s what parents teach about swearing that matters most.
“They’re gonna hear the words anyway,” Kleemeier says, “but I think the fewer times they hear it, the more they see you deal with frustrations without cursing, the better off they’re gonna be.”
And he says parents need to be consistent, clear and creative about what language is right and wrong. “If they’re angry, give them some words to express their anger, if they’re feeling hurt, give them some words to express their hurt that are acceptable to you family.”
Tips for Parents
Adults and kids have practiced cursing and swearing for years, and in most places, you can let it all out without being strong-armed by the law. However, some places will enforce legal action as a way to keep bad language under control. In fact, a Michigan man was convicted under an 1897 statute for public swearing in the hearing distance of children after his canoe capsized.
For years, the federal government has done its part in keeping the stench of foul words out of the airwaves. In 1978, the U.S. Supreme Court addressed the matter of certain curse words being broadcast on the radio. The case was brought forth by the Pacifica Foundation, who received a letter of reprimand for airing comedian George Carlin’s “Filthy Words” on its station, WBAI. In the monologue, Carlin states seven deadly words unacceptable for broadcast media. The Supreme Court established the rule of “pervasiveness,” meaning that because of the media’s broad reach, it would be difficult to keep children from hearing the content and allows for government regulations.
When kids curse, most adults look at them in shock, yet cursing is such a common part of everyday language. According to Dr. Timothy Jay, a professor and author of Cursing in America, cursing has its merits. Jay says its use is a way to express certain feelings, like frustration and anger, without acting out physically.
Why then do we look in dismay at children who curse? Probably because of a little concept called “manners.” There are certain behaviors that “civilized” people don’t engage in, or if they do, it’s only in certain environments. Usually when small kids start to use curse words, they don’t even know what they are saying and are probably just repeating what they heard an older person say. If they are told not to say certain words and are not exposed to those words, they usually will stop.
Older children and teens, on the other hand, have a clearer idea of what curse words mean and exactly how to use them. Many times, teens go through stages of rebelliousness and are fascinated with behaviors that are “taboo.” Using curse words is just one of those behaviors, and, over time, most of them usually learn to watch their language, too.
References
Parents Television Council
U.S. Supreme Court
“If you’re a teenage boy and you’re hanging with a bunch of your peers and you get the reputation as the guy whose offended by a cuss word, you will be teased unmercifully.”
– Robert Kleemeier, Ph.D., Psychologist
A fight at the batting cage and one kid expresses his anger with profanity: “shut the f..k up … you fat...”
If you think words like that are shocking to kids- think again. Cussing is common in their conversations.
“I say s..t, I say damn, but when I get mad I say f..k,” says 14-year-old MaryLou.
15-year-old Bobby says, “F..k, damn, b..ch.”
And 11-year-old Sara says “S..t,” but only “when something happens.”
In fact, some experts say in some kids social circles swearing is not just accepted, but expected. “If you’re a teenage boy and you’re hanging with a bunch of your peers and you get the reputation as the guy who’s offended by a cuss word, you will be teased unmercifully,” explains psychologist Dr. Robert Kleemeier.
Bobby agrees, “I think it’s just a manlier way to express yourself.”
Experts estimate that some kids use profanity upwards of 80 times a day. They say it’s, in part, due to television.
In fact, according to the Parents Television Council, the use of swear words on T-V has nearly doubled in the past ten years.
But, experts say, pop culture aside, it’s what parents teach about swearing that matters most.
“They’re gonna hear the words anyway,” Kleemeier says, “but I think the fewer times they hear it, the more they see you deal with frustrations without cursing, the better off they’re gonna be.”
And he says parents need to be consistent, clear and creative about what language is right and wrong. “If they’re angry, give them some words to express their anger, if they’re feeling hurt, give them some words to express their hurt that are acceptable to you family.”
Tips for Parents
Adults and kids have practiced cursing and swearing for years, and in most places, you can let it all out without being strong-armed by the law. However, some places will enforce legal action as a way to keep bad language under control. In fact, a Michigan man was convicted under an 1897 statute for public swearing in the hearing distance of children after his canoe capsized.
For years, the federal government has done its part in keeping the stench of foul words out of the airwaves. In 1978, the U.S. Supreme Court addressed the matter of certain curse words being broadcast on the radio. The case was brought forth by the Pacifica Foundation, who received a letter of reprimand for airing comedian George Carlin’s “Filthy Words” on its station, WBAI. In the monologue, Carlin states seven deadly words unacceptable for broadcast media. The Supreme Court established the rule of “pervasiveness,” meaning that because of the media’s broad reach, it would be difficult to keep children from hearing the content and allows for government regulations.
When kids curse, most adults look at them in shock, yet cursing is such a common part of everyday language. According to Dr. Timothy Jay, a professor and author of Cursing in America, cursing has its merits. Jay says its use is a way to express certain feelings, like frustration and anger, without acting out physically.
Why then do we look in dismay at children who curse? Probably because of a little concept called “manners.” There are certain behaviors that “civilized” people don’t engage in, or if they do, it’s only in certain environments. Usually when small kids start to use curse words, they don’t even know what they are saying and are probably just repeating what they heard an older person say. If they are told not to say certain words and are not exposed to those words, they usually will stop.
Older children and teens, on the other hand, have a clearer idea of what curse words mean and exactly how to use them. Many times, teens go through stages of rebelliousness and are fascinated with behaviors that are “taboo.” Using curse words is just one of those behaviors, and, over time, most of them usually learn to watch their language, too.
References
Parents Television Council
U.S. Supreme Court
Wednesday, December 3, 2008
Parents Universal Resource Experts - Sue Scheff - Teen Courts
Source: Connect with Kids
“[I]t feels like at times you have more … power in the school system and more of a chance to make a decision for others and help make decisions.”
– Anthony Mayson, 14 years old
“Can you all please stand and raise your right hand,” the bailiff says as he administers the oath to the eight jurors about to hear a case.
Meanwhile, in another room, the “attorneys” prepare their cases for the prosecution and the defense while the judge prepares to enter the courtroom.
There’s only one unusual thing about everyone involved in this court proceeding: All of the participants are high school students. However, the cases they handle are real.
Eight years ago, about 80 youth court programs existed across the country. Today, that number has increased to more than a thousand.
Fourteen-year-old Anthony Mayson says participating in the teen court gives him – and the other students involved – a real feeling of empowerment.
“It feels good. And it feels like at times you have more … power in the school system and more of a chance to make a decision for others and help make decisions,” Anthony says. “[It gives you a chance to] not only be a younger person but be able to be at the same level as an adult.”
Most teen courts handle minor discipline problems ranging from insubordination to first-offense truancy. Teen courts do have power. The sentences are limited to written apologies or hours of community service, but the indictment, the defense, the prosecution and the verdict are handled entirely by the students.
John De Caro, a teen court coordinator, says the youth court helps demystify the legal process for teens and makes them feel like they’re part of the system.
“[It helps break] down the barrier between the “us” and “them” that usually exists,” De Caro says. “And this way, it’s sort of in their own hands and they feel as though they have an actual stake in the system.”
Experts say that parents should encourage their children to participate in a teen court in their community or in their school. If the community doesn’t have a youth court, families should help start one in order to provide their children with the opportunity to learn about responsibility and the consequences of risky behavior.
“It’s no longer something that they just view on television or hear about on the news; it’s actually [something] that they can get a feel for themselves,” says faculty adviser Charlotte Brown.
Tips for Parents
– Anthony Mayson, 14 years old
“Can you all please stand and raise your right hand,” the bailiff says as he administers the oath to the eight jurors about to hear a case.
Meanwhile, in another room, the “attorneys” prepare their cases for the prosecution and the defense while the judge prepares to enter the courtroom.
There’s only one unusual thing about everyone involved in this court proceeding: All of the participants are high school students. However, the cases they handle are real.
Eight years ago, about 80 youth court programs existed across the country. Today, that number has increased to more than a thousand.
Fourteen-year-old Anthony Mayson says participating in the teen court gives him – and the other students involved – a real feeling of empowerment.
“It feels good. And it feels like at times you have more … power in the school system and more of a chance to make a decision for others and help make decisions,” Anthony says. “[It gives you a chance to] not only be a younger person but be able to be at the same level as an adult.”
Most teen courts handle minor discipline problems ranging from insubordination to first-offense truancy. Teen courts do have power. The sentences are limited to written apologies or hours of community service, but the indictment, the defense, the prosecution and the verdict are handled entirely by the students.
John De Caro, a teen court coordinator, says the youth court helps demystify the legal process for teens and makes them feel like they’re part of the system.
“[It helps break] down the barrier between the “us” and “them” that usually exists,” De Caro says. “And this way, it’s sort of in their own hands and they feel as though they have an actual stake in the system.”
Experts say that parents should encourage their children to participate in a teen court in their community or in their school. If the community doesn’t have a youth court, families should help start one in order to provide their children with the opportunity to learn about responsibility and the consequences of risky behavior.
“It’s no longer something that they just view on television or hear about on the news; it’s actually [something] that they can get a feel for themselves,” says faculty adviser Charlotte Brown.
Tips for Parents
Teen courts are real elements of the judicial system that are run by and for young people. In a teen court, all or most of the major players in the courtroom are teens: the lawyers, bailiffs, defendants, jurors, prosecutor, defense attorney and even the judge. A teen court either sets the sentence for teens who have pleaded guilty or tries the case of teens who – with parental approval – have agreed to its jurisdiction.
How many teen courts are there in the United States? What began as just a handful of programs in the 1960s has risen to over 1,000 teen courts in operation, according to the U.S. Justice Department.
The Office of Juvenile Justice and Delinquency Prevention (OJJDP) says that teen courts are generally used for younger juveniles (ages 10 to 15), those with no prior arrest records and those charged with less serious violations, including the following:
Shoplifting
Vandalism
Illegal alcohol possession
Criminal or malicious mischief
Disorderly conduct
Traffic violations
The OJJDP says that teen courts impose the following types of sentences:
Paying restitution (monetary or in kind)
Attending educational classes
Writing apology letters
Writing essays
Serving jury duty on subsequent cases
According to the National Crime Prevention Council (NCPC), while these courts may vary in composition, responsibilities and operation from town to town, their goal remains the same: to provide teens with an opportunity to take an active role in addressing the problem of juvenile crime within their communities.
Teen courts take advantage of two of the most powerful forces in the life of an adolescent – the desire for peer approval and the reaction to peer pressure. Teens sometimes respond better to their peers than to adult authority figures. Youth courts can be a potentially effective alternative to traditional juvenile courts staffed with paid professionals, such as lawyers, judges and probation officers.
The U.S. Justice Department says that teen courts offer at least four potential benefits:
Accountability: Teen courts may help to ensure that young offenders are held accountable for their illegal behavior, even when their offenses are relatively minor and would not likely result in sanctions from the traditional juvenile justice system.
Timeliness: An effective teen court can move young offenders from arrest to sanctions within a matter of days instead of months that may pass with traditional juvenile courts.
Cost savings: Teen courts usually depend heavily on youth and adult volunteers, with relatively little cost to the community. The average annual cost for operating a teen court is $32,822, according to the National Youth Court Center.
Community cohesion: A well-structured and expansive teen court program can affect the entire community by increasing public appreciation of the legal system, enhancing community-court relationships, encouraging greater respect for the law among teens and promoting volunteerism among both adults and teens.
References
National Crime Prevention Council
U.S. Department of Justice
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